A rare night alone – well, alone as defined by two kids sleeping soundly in bed, and a wife out with a few of her girlfriends. Feeling a wee bit of melancholy – a combination of lack of sleep, over work, guilt, and the familiar echoes of the autumn.

Had breakfast with a friend this morning and realized how much of my life now is routine. Kids, work, dishes, laundry, bed. Lather, rinse and repeat. The kids take up a lot of time and energy, and with them and work there’s precious little left over for me – let alone for J. and me, and even less for socialness outside of family. Saturday’s cold incessant rain, for example, was made for a quiet day under a blanket with my reading lamp and my nook – no such luxury, unfortunately. It’s the stark reality of our lives. A choice we made to be sure, but not exactly highly advertised as part of the experience.  There are times I wish I could go back to before I was married and had children and shake myself into trying to enjoy the relative freedom that I had at that point in my life and to stop worrying about how I was going to get from where I was then to where I am now. Hell, I still do that more than I like, worrying about what’s to come and not enjoying the “now” as much as I can. At least I don’t do that  as much as I used to, at least. Progress, albeit in miniscule steps.

Less than three weeks until our little 24 hour adult getaway. I can’t wait. Need to decide if we should do Obelisk for dinner or the newer Eola. Both Prixe Fixe menus that change daily, and both near Dupont Circle where we’ll be staying.  To say I can’t wait is an understatement. To say that the thought has been the only thing getting me through the day is overstatement. But just a little.

You know, I miss the relative community that LJ used to provide. It’s not the same around here, more like how the dorms used to feel when it was  finals week and you were the ones that had a final on the last possible day.